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I’ve been back from two nights in Bruges for about four hours and I’m already wanting to sand floorboards and lay tiles. People always say it’s beautiful but boring. I don’t mind boring. Nor do I mind chocolate, seafood, steak, chips, painted brickwork or tiles. If any of these things interest you then you should manage a couple of days there.

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As usual, Paddy (who is now alone in a hostel in Ghent, waiting to talk about death and punishment in a conference) found the best accommodation. I didn’t think about work once.

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